(no subject)

[katallison]

Delivery of the new bed had been promised between 8 and 10 this morning, so I was a bit peeved when the truck didn't roll up until 11:15. I was immediately mollified, however, by the two young delivery guys--a gorgeous black man with dreadlocks and ripply arm muscles and a vaguely Caribbean accent, and a cute white kid with a buzzcut and *short* short cut-offs and fuck-me construction-worker boots at the end of his long bare muscular legs. Both were very sweet, and I felt a slight twinge of guilt for my pervy fantasies about just what they might have been getting up to in the back of the truck to make them so late. (My god, I never used to be like this before I met all you people. You ought to be so *ashamed*...)

They left, and I set to ripping apart the huge boxes and studying the cryptic instructions for assembly of the bed frame. Two conclusions: (a) technical writing, as a discipline, has before it vast virgin territories where its very existence is unknown (say, for instance, the crafting of instructions for assemble-it-yourself furniture); and (b) putting together a heavy iron bedframe is something that really goes much better if you have more than one person involved.

Nevertheless, I forged ahead, undaunted by grey blurry line drawings of complex jointures, and the need to go down to the hardware store and replace all the *crap* bolts that were supplied. And I am now sweaty, sore, very achey in the lower back, but by god I have a bed that is, like, *yards* up off the floor. When I was done, and had put clean sheets on, and the bedspread, I flopped onto it, and felt like I could almost reach up and touch the ceiling. Never again will I have bedcovers trailing on the dusty floor and getting stepped on! Plus, in addition, my vast I am Mighty Furniture Assembly Woman! mojo has been replenished. And I even got the acreage of cardboard packaging broken down and tied up and set out for recycling. Now for a hot bath and a cold beer.

Comments

All Hail Mighty Furniture Assembly Woman!!

[(Anonymous)]

Yay to go! I didn't realize that you had already bought a bed or I would have recommened this earlier. You can get a cordless battery operated screwdriver at Walgreens or Walmart (under $20). Even though you've got your bed up, it's still a handy gizmo to have around. I just bought a great new chair for the computer desk and put up new curtain rods. I would have been able to do either without killing my wrists without this handy tool.
Enjoy your new bed. I know how it feels; I bought a new bed, box frame, matters and ALL last year and I just can't believe how convenient and comfortable it is. Lots of space under that bed for storing boxes of my videos, easy to get out off in the morning, and looks great with a new coverlet in tones of blue and purple.

namaste SF Nancy

ps - enjoy the fantasies! Isn't it fun to be pervy!

[katallison.livejournal.com]

easy to get out off in the morning

I know! This morning, I woke up feeling like my four limbs weighed a hundred pounds each, and after a few minutes of lying there and moaning, I just rolled to the side and presto! Standing upright! Instead of having to lurch and heave myself to the vertical! Man, it's really nice to have gravity working *for* me, for once in my old age.

[arallara.livejournal.com]

Kat, my dear, I have said it before, but it bears repeating: you rock. I hope your bath and beer have been wonderful, and I hope your new bed so high above the ground brings a refreshing new perspective to your world of sleep. *g* I need to email you!

[katallison.livejournal.com]

You're so sweet! *g* And not to stress about e-mail, which I'd bet I'm further behind on than you. It's good to see your LJ posts from time to time, and know that you're well and squeeing happily over the sparkly boys.

[wereadshite.livejournal.com]

Woot! And now *I'm* thinking about your delivery boys. So much kink in one place!

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Pretty, pretty boys. I thought about asking if they'd like to help put the bed together and then test it out...

[thete1.livejournal.com]

*ahahahaa* I adore you. ;-)

[ardent-muses.livejournal.com]

Congratulations! I hate putting things together, but I do love that feelng of competence at the end. (Which is good, because I really have no choice but to do it myself!)

And *word* on the instructions. Why don't they hire actual *writers* to do this stuff? Because there are a lot of us out here and it's not like we have so much money we wouldn't be interested. *G*

Tomorrow, write and let us know how you slept. :)

[katallison.livejournal.com]

There's a whole technical writing curriculum at the university where I work which I've long wanted to sample, partly because it just sounds like fun, but also because I wonder if it might help me with my writing bete noire, the actiony scenes. You know, developing that skill of taking a complex sequences of actions/procedures, breaking them down, describing them simply and clearly.

Oh, and I slept very well, although I discovered a strange brief recurrence of my old childhood fears of Monsters Under The Bed.

[theodosia.livejournal.com]

>Oh, and I slept very well, although I discovered a strange brief recurrence of my old childhood fears of Monsters Under The Bed.

Just keep your feet away from the edge, and under the covers at all times, and you will be fine! :-)

[viedma.livejournal.com]

that's one reason i asked Dad to take the frame off mine when i was a kid. Then i missed being able to store my crap underneath it!

Way to go, Kat. You truly ARE furniture assembly goddess! A couple of nights in a bed that's not a slingshot, and you'll start to knit back together. :-)

[yonmei.livejournal.com]

(My god, I never used to be like this before I met all you people. You ought to be so *ashamed*...)

Mmmm, pervy fantasies....

Plus, yay! for Mighty Furniture Assembly Woman mojo!

[katallison.livejournal.com]

*flexing biceps mightily*

You know, I realize that every stick of furniture in my house (except for the sofa and the antique rolltop) I assembled myself. That's a lot o' mojo (and a lot of hours of cursing and fiddling and staring at incomprehensible instructions). I think my original idea was that next time I move I could just take everything apart, and it would be much more easily portable. AH HAH HAH HAH HAH!!!!

[virgulesmith.livejournal.com]

Can I borrow some of that mojo in 6-8 weeks when my bed comes in.

Glad to know there are hot delivery guys still roaming the earth.

[caille.livejournal.com]

Hey, my beautiful iron bed got assembled by the nice but not-hot delivery guys, who also hauled away the old mattress...

But I assembled a large, fairly complicated bookcase on my own, with instructions only in Danish, and no way to call anyone to pathetically whine for help, because the phone wasn't working yet...

But in the end, I triumphed, and as I muscled the behemoth upright, I could hear the thunderous opening chords of "Also Sprach Zarathustra", and there I was, a proud hominid who'd just made a tremendous evolutionary leap forward.

Was it like that for you? And...when you have guests (guests who aren't necessarily orgasm friends), will they be invited to sleep with you?

Kat, the mighty mojo woman.

[(Anonymous)]

Yes - getting out of bed is a lot easier when you don't have to pull yourself off the floor. Gravity is now your friend. It's also a lot easier to move the damn thing - I needed to paint my bedroom last year and nearly threw my back out trying to drag the mattress into the next room. That and my increasing difficulty in getting off the mattress helped me make up my mind. Buy a new bed! Love the new bed! Bed pretty! Good for back and good for Nancy.

Take care and get lots of sleep!

namaste SF Nancy