(no subject)

[katallison]

Dear Target Corp.:

Look, I am not deranged. I know better than to go to one of your fine retail outlets expecting, oh, well-designed goods, or clothing that is anything other than shoddy and ugly. I shop your stores for basic functional necessities like toothpaste and lightbulbs and socks. Socks. You know, those basic functional things you put on your feet before donning your shoes.

So can you enlighten me as to why your fine retail outlets do not, among their vast array of tawdry offerings, see fit to include so much as a single pair of plain grey women's socks??? You have black socks, right. You have an astonishing selection of repulsive foo-foo socks in pink, baby blue, and stripes, patterned with puppies and bunnies, bedecked with lace and spangles. You have enough white athletic socks to equip the Army of the Republic. But--and I repeat--you do not carry a single fucking pair of plain grey socks.

Target Corp., may you rot in hell, because you are going to force me to sacrifice two hours of precious internet-gay-smut-reading time to drive to the mall, park, hike, search, stand in line, hike, and drive, simply so that I may procure a few pairs of plain grey socks, those being exactly the kind of thing that a purveyor of life's basic functional necessities, such as yourself, should by god carry.

Dreaming of jamming a breathtakingly ugly Michael Graves toaster up your corporate bunghole, I remain,
Yours truly,
Kat

(And don't even get me started on the apparently doomed effort to find, anywhere on this PLANET, a simple, ordinary pair of grey cotton twill pants. With a waist that comes to the waist, and a comfortable degree of looseness through the butt and thighs. Of the sort that any person of the male persuasion can find anywhere within ten minutes. The only times I wish I were a guy is when I go clothes shopping, because my GOD, the ugliness of women's apparel ...)

Comments

[tzikeh.livejournal.com]

Why don't you order your socks from an online clothing store? You can get them in bulk.

[katallison.livejournal.com]

*sigh* I probably should, except I'm going out of town early Friday and just discovered OMG all my grey socks are full of holes and falling apart and I was hoping to replace them before I left.

And part of this is just venting of the cumulative irkedness caused by every visit to my crappy neighborhood Target, which is pretty much guaranteed to be out of whatever particular item one went there to get. I'm not sure why I even go there, except it's only a half-mile from my house, and usually offers some bizarre people-watching opportunities.

[tzikeh.livejournal.com]

Ohhhhh, I didn't realize this was a time-of-the-essence thingy. Meh - sorry.

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Not at all, this falls into the category of "Self, when are you going to learn to actually notice that key wardrobe elements are falling into disrepair at some point *before* you have to start flinging them into suitcases??" (*g*)

[sophia-helix.livejournal.com]

Aw. Speaking as someone who furnished most of her kitchen with things from her Target wedding registry, I find it difficult to emphasize, but as the plump young woman who spent two hours at Target last week trying to find shirts that a) fit, and b) were not fashioned in a color or material hideous to behold, I'm right there with you.

But whaddya got against the Michael Graves toaster? It's all chromey! Like, uh, my chrome blender from Target. *g*

[katallison.livejournal.com]

*g* Well, having calmed down a bit and caught my breath, I'll concede that not everything from Target is bad (I've certainly dropped a lot of cash there over the years), and also that that chrome toaster is way cuter than my own godawful Hamilton Beach toaster (Target-bought, heh), which looks like something Darth Vader would design if he'd gone into home appliances.

And I am right there with you on the Target women's clothes. I mean, hell, I'm a size 8, and even the XL shirts don't fit me. Who is *buying* this stuff??

[the-shoshanna.livejournal.com]

At the seder I went to on Sunday, one of Geoff's cousins, who I guess works in the clothing industry, had brought a big bag of socks -- samples, or something -- that people could go through and take whatever they wanted.

Most of them were stripes of the Sort I Do Not Wear, or little pink flying pigs, or the like, and there were a lot of fuzzy toe socks, but I did grab a pair of dark red chenille socks.

I say again: chenille socks. I've never imaged any such thing.

But no gray ones there either. I'm with tzikeh; go on line.

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Chenille socks *rule* -- I've got a beige-ish pair I often wear on winter evenings with my slippers, and they are a great pleasure to the feet.

And on-line may be my ultimate recourse, but I've got to get some new socks before I fly out of town crack o' dawn on Friday. *sigh*

[prillalar]

This is probably why I am currently wearing:

* a men's shirt
* a men's undershirt
* a pair of something that would be called capris if they weren't also from the men's department (deck pants maybe?)

I draw the line at buying men's undewear, though.

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Actually, almost all my shirts/sweaters have been bought in the men's dept. I just wish I didn't have the waist/hip ratio that renders men's pants impossible for me to fit into, drat it.

[unmisha.livejournal.com]

I dunno about the underwear bit - boxer shorts can be pretty comfy nightwear/slouch around the house-wear.

[caille.livejournal.com]

Go to google, click on their "Froogle" feature, and type "grey cotton twill pants".

It looks like Northface has a pant called Women's Genesis Pant in graphite (and khaki) for $35. I kinda like it. The thing with mail-order is that at first, you may have to do some returns until you get the sizing right. That's annoying, but once you understand how a company's clothes fit, you're likely to be able to count on sizing consistency throughout the line.

I hate clothes-store shopping. I am currently spared from it due to the extreme lack of actual money.

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Hm...the Genesis ones seem a little low-waisted; but North Face has a Teton Utility Pants line that look like they just might fit the bill. Thanks for the suggestion!

[wickdzoot.livejournal.com]

Oh, my god, you are so right. Worse yet, even when you can find grey socks, they're usually packaged with red and white, or some shade probably only worn by teenage girls and/or cheerleaders or people in marching bands forced to wear colorful uniforms.

Let's not even talk about a sweater that comes past your belly button unless you buy a sweater made for men. This is the season of short sweaters, evidently, and while I'm not barrel shaped precisely, I certainly am not shaped so that I want a sweater that rides along my belly button.

And yes on the pants, too.

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Oh my GOD, the short sweaters--what is up with that?? Apart from any issues of aesthetics and the "roll out the barrel" factor, they're drafty as hell in this climate. This is why I love men's sweaters, which by god come down to the hips, and also skim forgivingly over the (ahem) abdominal regions.

And the packaging of socks in multi-color assortments makes me just want to throttle people. But then I am apparently in a mood of deep sartorial crankiness this evening.

[wickdzoot.livejournal.com]

:high fives kat: I am so with you, sistah. We must reclaim the right to have monocolored packs of socks! To have sweaters that don't ride up! Listen, my ass is big, my belly not so much, but I had two kids, and there ain't no way I'm ever tempted to get a belly button piercing and wear crop tops, good lord.

I hates 'em precious, I does.

[cherryice.livejournal.com]

If you find some you like, buy the guy's pants. *G*

Of course, I'm the girl who lines in guy's bunnyhugs (they're so much cheaper, and don't have random cleavage -- bunnyhugs should not display cleavage). I also find little boy's shoes work much better than women's, plus you don't have to pay tax on kid's shoes, no matter how old you are.

Boy's shirts are great, too. Guy's clothing has more room through the bust that girl's does, actually -- it doesn't completely get rid of the "gigantic spaces of too much fabric through the stomach" effect, but it does give a nice line.

And the best thing? If the girl's is bright pink, the guy's will usually be a wicked bright green.

[namastenancy.livejournal.com]

Buy men's socks! They are cheaper, better quality and have a wider selection. I started buying men's socks years ago and have never returned to the women's section. Well, once. I was seduced by a bag of women's socks that fell apart on first washing.

And I envy you your Target! We don't have one in SF and the city is seriously lacking in places to buy cheap, fun stuff. SF does uber-expensive very well. But inexpensive. No way!

Good luck.

namaste SF Nancy

[imkalena.livejournal.com]

LOL!!! There IS no such thing anymore as a pair of women's pants where the waist comes to the waist. Except for the ONE fucking pair I bought from Eddie Bauer which is the world's most perfectly-fitting, attractive pair of pants and they sold out the line and I CAN'T GET ANOTHER PAIR.

BASTARDS.

[giglet.livejournal.com]

Until the fashion industry loses it's stranglehold on the garment industry,
what we -- the human-shaped women of America -- need, is custom clothes. Well-made, dammit, in durable and attractive fabrics. With big fucking pockets.

Deva isn't *too* far off, but I'm still looking for my perfect supplier.

[flambeau.livejournal.com]

*hands you a pair of grey cotton toe socks*

You're on your own with the pants, though - I've been looking for years.

[nagasvoice.livejournal.com]

Men's socks--Costco, white, 12-pack.
Men's wife-beater tanktops--nearly anywhere but at WalMart, for their maltratement of their women employeesin the US, for their upper-level greed, for their Chinese sweatshops and dangerously unregulated children's toys made with gawd-knows-what-volatiles in both paint and stuffing.
But not to digress...
Used to be, I wore men's work shirts, men's sweatpants in very large sizes, or men's jeans.
There was nowhere else to go with clothes in the 80's if you did dirty work and were 6' plus with shoulders that would rip out a cramped weeny little polyester Lane Bryant shirt if you so much as stretched out for the top shelves in the shop, let alone lifted up that forty-gallon palm tree for somebody and threw it their convertible with just the right kind of cheerful panache.
BUt one does get tired of wearing raggedy men's shirts, at last.
Now, having acquired a much more civilized salary, I've become spoiled rotten. The family seamstresses will make me lovely things in matching long split skirts and 2-pocket button-front shirts with gently constructed sholders that wear like iron for fifteen years if I'm properly careful and try NOT TO WEAR MY LUNCH. Well, I mean, so long as I buy them interesting fabrics to play with. (Which means stuff that costs more than $3 a yard, you know. It better be at least $9 a yard now, if you wan to make it work the effort for anybody's time.)
Which is more fun for me anyway.
And if I want to sit on the filing room floor to get at the bottom shelf (as well as the top shelf) then I can sit on the floor in my split skirt in perfect comfort, and in relative, if not perfect, dignity.
I have no idea why all the ghetto girls are putting up with Jennifer Lopez low-riders that probably belong on no body except a perfect size 2 Latina in rock-solid shape.
I don't see many of those.
I suppose I should applaud the right of women everywhere to reclaim their belly buttons in public. I suppose I should applaud the right of large women to show whatever expanses they care to.
It's just the idea that they're hideously uncomfortable about it and doing it because they have no choice, there's NOTHING else out there they can purchase at anything in their price range, within their nearest five zipcodes, that makes me ticked off.

[planetalyx.livejournal.com]

Target Corp., may you rot in hell, because you are going to force me to sacrifice two hours of precious internet-gay-smut-reading time

This is the funniest thing I've read all week.

(I made your chicken with artichokes for company last night and it was a smash hit!)

[thisisbone.livejournal.com]

These may not be what you're looking for (I see they're not offering a granite or gray option right now... probably because it's April not September), but they fit at the waist, give through the hips and thighs, and are sort of ridiculously warm and comfortable.

I hear you on the socks thing, though we're lucky enough to have a Super Target (AKA the "Supay Tarzhay") about ten minutes away, and it's one of the good ones. I get all my turtlenecks there -- they're $7.99 each, and they've lasted me two winters so far without stretching or shrinking.

[eliade.livejournal.com]

The only times I wish I were a guy is when I go clothes shopping, because my GOD, the ugliness of women's apparel ...

Oh my god, I am so so there with you. After realizing that all my springy-summery clothes in the closet are too big, I've been trying to find some new stuff to wear--just shirts, at that. But there is NOTHING. I've been to four downtown stores in the last few days and I managed to find 2 basic tee-shirts, black and white, and a single striped shirt. WTF? Everything is so horrifically bad. At first I thought it was just the larger "Women's World" sizes, but no. The stuff for your average smallish woman is awful too. Designers are on crack. Pink? PINK? Jesus god.

/thus ends my rant for the day

[laurashapiro.livejournal.com]

I've been very happy with American Apparel (http://www.americanapparel.net/). Stylish without being stupid, inexpensive, well-made, interesting colors, sexy -- and made in the US by well-treated workers.

[laurashapiro.livejournal.com]

No Sweat Apparel (http://www.nosweatapparel.com/miva/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Product_Code=WW2400) has grey socks, and they're politically correct, too. I realize time is of the essence, but this might be something to keep in mind for next time.

JCP all the way

[(Anonymous)]

Penney's for Gold Toe never-fall-apart white, black, and gray socks.

Penney's for Docker's and St. John's Bay twills and chinos in numerous colors which come to the WAIST. Er, the pants, not the colors.

Penney's for one more source of all the sweatshop stuff that we buy because by the time we've found something that's NOT sweatshop--never mind anything that actually fits or is becoming, just something not tainted with the blood of Chinese child labor--we've worn out another pair of pants just sitting and searching. Deva, I love you, but are you office wear? In fact, you are not. Penney's, you're undoubtedly evil, but at least you carry basic business-wear necessities in my size and don't make moral judgments about birth control. That I've heard of.

Die, Target. Die, Wal-Mart. Die, yes, even Land's End, whose nice Drifter sweaters and cardigans come in human shapes, human colors, and not a crop top among them, but whose labels read, invariably, yes, IMPORTED, which as far as I can tell is code for "tainted with the blood of Chinese child labor." Would someone tell me why, why, why it's so damn impossible to find non-sweatshop anything? Wouldn't you think someone besides Deva would want to market to my guilt and shame? I'm not asking for it to be cheap, just existent.

That other Cat, also annoyed with retail

[twistedchick]

Believe it or not, I am still wearing plain grey socks I bought from Woodward & Lothrop, before it went bust more than ten years ago.

(But if you find the yarn you like, at your friendly neighborhood yarn store on Grand Street, I'd be willing to knit you a pair.)