(no subject)

[katallison]

I've been trying to type up a grand summative entry about 2007, but you know what? Ta heck with it. Thumbnail sketch: after three years of ineffectual sitting and dithering, 2007 was the year I quit a job I hated, left a university I'd been part of most of my life but with which I'd grown disenchanted, ended a fifteen-year relationship, left a house I'd lived in for seventeen years, divested myself of two-thirds of my worldly belongings, and departed from the city and region that had been my home for half a century, to move halfway across the country and begin a new life.

The factoids themselves are not all that interesting; the emotional states associated with them might be rather more so, but I don't know that I have enough understanding of them yet to write them up. What I do know right now is: I have no regrets for having done any of this, though life just now is a bit more precarious than the ideal. I do have some regrets for how I handled some of the departures and endings, but I have no doubt that making the move was the right thing to do.

And one other thing I do know: 2007 was a testimonial to the fact that action (even if imperfectly executed) trumps sitting and dithering. This is a lesson I've never been able to really get a handle on, being, apparently, deeply and intractably sit-and-dither-prone. But insofar as I have resolutions in mind for this year, they coalesce vaguely around that whole action thing, in many forms and directions. Yeah.

Comments

[lynnmonster.livejournal.com]

Go, you!

I hope that 2008 brings things into somewhat more ideal shape.

Happy New Year!

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much, and a (belated) happy NY to you as well!

[rosawestphalen.livejournal.com]

You are brave and amazing. Huge change on that scale requires a great deal of emotional acrobatics. Congratulations on your year of change and good luck with all the new in this new year!

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Yeah, "emotional acrobatics" describes it perfectly; so far I'm staying up there on the tightrope, but damn, there are days it shimmies in the wind a bit. (*g*) Thanks so much for the kind words and good wishes!

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

YES! That's the key to everything: action diminishes fear. Or, as a shrink told me once, it's better to be anxious about what you're doing than depressed that you aren't doing anything.

Brava to you for your absolute, well, bravery, in 2007. Here's to an excellent outcome in 2008 for all your chutzpah.

[katallison.livejournal.com]

I just don't know why this lesson is so frickin' hard for me to retain. (*sigh*) But anyway, thanks so much, Shay, for your encouragement! I'll really miss seeing you in '08, if I'm not able to get out east for Con.txt (which looks very unlikely at this point), but -- '09 for sure! And best wishes to you for a wonderful year!

[reginagiraffe]

action (even if imperfectly executed) trumps sitting and dithering

I finally got the gumption to call the plumber to fix the faucet that's been leaking for the last month and a half!

Plus he's going to install the new sink that we've had for, oh, about a year and a half. (We'd do the install ourselves - we've done replacements before - but it involves drilling through tile to install the new bracket which the old sink didn't use.) Plus he installed shutoff valves right at the tub. Plus he's going to fix the newly-dripping shower (cracked stem).

So yes, action beats dithering but, Man!, do I love me some rut.

Good luck with all your actions in the coming year!

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Man!, do I love me some rut.

(*is unable to resist giggling inappropriately*)

No, but really, huge congrats to you on finally calling the plumber; this is exactly the kind of thing I stall out on for months (or YEARS) at a time. Go you, and thanks for the good wishes!

[isiscolo.livejournal.com]

Yay you for taking your life into your own hands!

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Now if I can only not *drop* it-- (*juggling frantically*)

Thanks, Isis, and best wishes to you for a great '08!

[(Anonymous)]

Wow. You have balls of steel. As a lifelong sitter and ditherer, I salute you -- and I really do wish you the best of luck.

[iwondery.livejournal.com]

Sorry about the anon thing, I thought I was logged in.

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Oh, I know how that goes -- LJ keeps logging me out at random intervals, grrr. (*kicks LJ w/vigor*)

Thanks so much for the kind words and good wishes! I think starting life over in one's 50s is, on the whole, a highly invigorating experience, but there's no question it has its moments of OMFG WTF AAAIIEEE, so it's good to get messages of support from others.

[blacksquirrel.livejournal.com]

Well done you! It's not even so much the action thing as the change of direction thing that really inspires me about your transitions this year.

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Well, I'm eager to see where this all will end up, at least in the short run. Currently I am *vigorously* cursing the wet-cement-like slowness of academic hirings, but you know that as well as I, so... (*rueful shrug*).

And I hope '08 brings you great new opportunities and rewards!

[blacksquirrel.livejournal.com]

Ah yes, it's a constant challenge to explain academic hiring. I have relatives who I have to re-explain the process to every time I see them.

Thank you for the good wishes - all the best to you as well in the new year!

[namastenancy.livejournal.com]

Moving on is always scary but sitting still is worse. I have a friend who retired and has done nothing but eat, watch TV and count her money. Whenever I get anxious - and I am a very anxious person - about all the changes, risks and challenges that I am putting into my life, I look at my friend and realize that the cost of doing nothing is the death of the soul.

May 2008 bring you more balance within your soul.

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Oh, Nancy, you're a wonderfully gutsy person and an example to me of how to head into age with brio and courage. Thanks so much for your support and encouragement, my friend, and I send best wishes for a 2008 that brings you the rewards and satisfactions you've earned!

[anoel.livejournal.com]

Wow. That's a lot of changes! I'm really impressed you did so much and took the courageous route. I know sitting and dithering too well and am going to try to make a change as well. Action is definitely very important. Yay you!

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much, and I hope '08 brings you the changes you want!

[ignazwisdom.livejournal.com]

The factoids themselves are uninteresting

Says you -- I think it sounds like a hell of a story. But I understand not being able to write things up yet. I am glad that you know you made the right choices, and I hope 2008 treats you wonderfully!

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I'm still sort of living very much on the surface, day to day, and haven't yet *felt* my way into all these changes; but I know that'll come in time. Meanwhile, thanks for the kind words, and my best wishes to you for a wonderful 2008!

[heresluck]

::waves from afar::

::raises a glass in your general direction::

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Oh, dude, I am lifting a glass in return, but I must admit that, after the past couple of days it's only filled with water. (I might move on to V8 later, if I get to feeling frisky. *stares wanly at big pile of empty champagne bottles*) But the new year brings--yup, new job openings showing up on line, so it's ho! for yet another revision of the resume, and more goddamned cover letters, when I would SO much rather just teleport myself to your place for a couple of days. Much love to you, and I hope your 2008 is fabulous!

[sinensiss.livejournal.com]

::raises a glass of champagne:: really, every time I think about what you did in 2007, it's like a neon sign lights up in my brain that says "KAT ROCKS".

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Awww! But YOU are the rockingest one of all! Thanks so much for the kind words, and I hope you have a fabulous 2008!

[china_shop]

*cheers you on* Happy New Year! May 2008 bring you wonders and joy. :-)

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much, and I fling much (belated) happy New Year's confetti in your direction, with best wishes for a fabulous 2008!

[nagasvoice.livejournal.com]

A very happy New Year to you, and here's to having a great time in your new location!
(toasts you in your active phase!)

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much for the good wishes, and I hope your 2008 rocks the house!

[chickwriter.livejournal.com]

Kudos to you and a toast to 2008!

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much, and I lift a glass to you in return (though mine is filled with water at this point, because *dude*, the amount of champagne we got through over here in the past few days . . . )

Hope your 2008 is full of wonderfulness, just as you are!

[qe2.livejournal.com]

action (even if imperfectly executed) trumps sitting and dithering.

Word word wordity word. As my father used to put it, "Doin' stuff is better than not doin' stuff." *translates into Latin and makes into shared Q/Kat crest*

[katallison.livejournal.com]

Whooo, I get to share a crest with Q! (*dons it proudly*)

Yeah, I don't know why it's so damned hard for me to just--y'know, DO STUFF. But today I've already started working on revising the goddamn resume so I can apply to another bunch of goddamn jobs, about which I will get no response until the middle of goddamn FEBRUARY, given the glacial slowness with which academic hirings move. (*snarl*)

But, whatever. Staying upbeat! Staying ACTIVE! And sending you the best possible wishes for a 2008 that is entirely, 100%, and most well-deservedly suckage-free! (*embraces you*)

[qe2.livejournal.com]

*makes note to increase size of crest so it can be shared by CrestSister Kat*

(which, wow. is it just me, or does that look like an idea Anne McCaffrey thought better of?)

I don't know why it's so damned hard for me to just--y'know, DO STUFF.

Um. Fear of failure, loosely defined as "not doing [whatever it is] perfectly and to the satisfaction of everyone within earshot"? I might be projecting a bit there (it's been known to happen), but I think that's a major part of what fuels my procrastination engine.

(*snarl*)And sending you the best possible wishes for a 2008 that is entirely, 100%, and most well-deservedly suckage-free! (*embraces you*)

Here's to such a year for BOTH of us, eh? And to the end of March in Seattle, which will definitely help to abate any pending suckage in my life at that point...

[brooklinegirl.livejournal.com]

I SO admire you for all that you did this year. You took hold and just forged ahead and did what you needed and wanted to with your life. That takes so much guts, and I have been watching as you accomplished this huge, amazing thing in your life. 2008 is the year of WONDERFUL STUFF. I feel GOOD THINGS are afoot.

♥

[katallison.livejournal.com]

I tell you what, Tracey, one of the greatest pleasures of this holiday season has been reading your and Liz's accounts and descriptions of your festivities, and your retrospectives on 2007. Along with the whole "action" thing, my other main resolution for 2008 is HAVE FUN, which is--sort of an alien concept to me in many ways. But the joy and verve and love and general WHEEE LIFE IS GOOD that you both have going right now is *inspirational* -- and I know that for both of you it didn't come out of nowhere, that you've both earned it by going through hard sucky times and doing painful things. You have done SO MUCH this year, and done it really fucking WELL; I have huge, huge respect for you, and feel really lucky to know you.

And YAY for 2008 being the year of wonderful stuff!

[justacat.livejournal.com]

Well, look at it this way: when you do decide to act, you don't do it half-assed, do you?! That's a pretty amazing upheaval, and it's no wonder that you're not quite certain where you are, emotionally, yet. But what's so great is that the one thing you are certain of is that what you did was the right thing for you, what you needed to do to take your life where you wanted it to go. I think that's wonderful, and I'm so happy for you.

(But very bummed at the suggestion that you're probably going to miss con.txt!!! :( )

[maxinemayer.livejournal.com]

Kat - I hardly know what to say! This level of upheaval and yes, achievement, is awesome. To start over from scratch, taking with you only your skills and your courage - it's a great thing you've done. You're probably still in shock - I know I would be! Hang in there! My love and prayers are with you for a smashing, rocking, joyful 2008 for you and your friends! God bless! Love ya, max

[meri-oddities.livejournal.com]

Happy New Year. You know, I'm so impressed that you could do this. It takes some kind of bravery and determination to change such a settled, comfortable life. *applauds*

[raveninthewind.livejournal.com]

Best wishes for 2008.

Welcome to Seattle. :)